This tool was developed by Kay Walker, creator of this site and author of Read This Before You Kill Yourself
Stop negative behavior with this character modeling exercise
If your behavior does not match how you would like to behave, you can change it using what I call the Character Modeling tool. It’s an exercise I developed to help you quickly stop negative behavior and replace it with positive behaviors.
When you identify a behavior you want to change, you can change it simply by stepping into the beingness of another person. This person can be fictional or factual. It’s like role playing. It uses “the fake it till you make it principle”, allowing you to act like someone else until you can learn how to do it yourself.
Here’s how to use the Character Modeling tool:
Step 1: Choose or create a person with the behaviors you’d like to exhibit. This should be a person you’d like to be like.
Step 2: Define all the character traits that person would exhibit in a similar situation to you. You can think of this before a given situation occurs or as it happens.
Step 3: Be that person. You do this by staying present to what that person would do and how they would behave if they faced the same situation. In a sense you are role playing.
Personally, I tend to use powerful famous women that I look up to. When I have to interview someone who intimates me I choose to be Oprah WInfrey.
Here is how I see Oprah’s behaviors during an interview: Confident, personable, empathetic, human (relatable), authentic, not trying to be perfect, genuine.
When I step into being these traits I almost forget who I am and the fears that are hold me back.