Kay Walker – Page 14

Myths about suicide and depression – and what you can do

March 14, 2015 By Kay Walker Leave a Comment

Myth: The people who talk about suicide don’t take their lives

Research studies show that 75% or more of all suicides took actions in the weeks or months before their deaths that clearly shows they were in deep despair. Any person that expresses suicidal feelings should get immediate attention from a professional and support from friends and family.

Myth: Anyone who tries to kill himself is crazy

Only about 10% of all suicidal people are psychotic or have delusional beliefs about reality. Most suicidal people are suffering from severe depression; but many depressed people can still manage their daily lives and function. If someone is not acting crazy or weird, it doesn’t mean there is no risk of suicide. Seemingly completely normal acting people someones are suffering in silence and take their lives unexpectedly.

Those problems weren’t enough to commit suicide over, is often said by people who knew a completed suicide. You cannot assume that because you feel something is not worth being suicidal about, that the person you are with feels the same way. It is not how bad the problem is, but how badly it’s hurting the person who has it.

Remember: Suicidal behavior is a cry for help.

Myth: If a someone is going to kill himself, nothing can stop him

The fact that a person is still alive is adequate proof that part of them wants to remain alive. The suicidal person tends to be ambivalent — part of them wants to live and part of them wants the pain to end and death is way to stop it. It is the part of the sufferer that really wants to live that says to another person: I want to kill myself. If a suicidal person reaches out to you, it is likely because they believe you are caring, informed about coping with life, and they feel they can trust you. No matter how negative they may seem, the act of speaking about suicide to you is an act of reaching out and a request for help .

Give help sooner

Suicide prevention is not a sudden act. It is a planned process. Many suicidal people are afraid that asking for help will bring them additional pain because others might react by telling the sufferer that they are stupid, foolish, (in some cases) sinful. Some might be accused of manipulation. Other reactions can be rejection or punishment. There is a fear of suspension from school or job. Your job as the recipient of a cry for help it to everything you can to reduce their pain, rather than increase or prolong it. Helping, listening and offering support early as possible will reduce the risk of suicide.

Be available to listen

Give the person every opportunity to unburden his troubles and ventilate his feelings. You don’t need to say much and there are no magic words. If you are concerned, your voice and manner will show it. Give him relief from being alone with their pain and let them know you are grateful that they turned to you. Offer: patience, sympathy, acceptance. And do not engage in arguments or give advice. Ask them pointedly: Are you considering suicide?

Myth: Talking about suicide might give someone the idea to take their life

People already have the idea. Suicide is in the news media all the time. If you ask a depressed person this question you are doing a good thing for them: you are showing him that you care about him, that you take him seriously, you are listening and that you are there to let him share his pain with you. You are giving him a way to get rid of his painful feelings. If the person is having thoughts of suicide, find out how far along his ideas are about taking his life. It is just thoughts or has he started to plan actions?

If the person is clearly suicidal and ready to act, do not leave them alone.

If the means to take their lives are available then remove them.
Urge professional help.
You will need persistence and patience and may needed to seek, engage and continue to suggest as many options as possible.
If the person finds a professional to help them, continue to be available for them and offer your ongoing support and care.

Seek allies and help for yourself

Your suffering friend may say: “Don’t tell anyone.” It is the part of them that wants to stay alive that is sharing the secret with you that they may take their own life. Go and get your own help. Find someone you can trust and who can support you and review the situation with them. (You can get help and still protect someone’s privacy, if you wish.) Sharing your own anxieties and responsibilities of suicide prevention will make it easier and more effective.

Most people have suicidal thoughts or feelings at some point in their lives; yet less than 2% of all deaths are suicides. Nearly all suicidal people suffer from conditions that will pass with time or with the help of a mental health recovery program. There are hundreds of small and simple steps you can take to improve your response to a suicidal person and to make it easy for them to find and get help. Taking these steps will save a life and reduce his suffering.

Suicide warning signs

March 12, 2015 By Kay Walker Leave a Comment

According to MentalHealth.gov the US authority on laws governing mental health,

approximately 100 Americans die by suicide each day. Suicide is the third leading cause of death among 15-24 year olds and more than 8 million adults in the United States had serious thoughts of suicide within the past 12 months.

Major suicide warning signs

If someone you know is showing one or more of the following behaviors, he or she may be thinking about suicide. Don’t ignore these warning signs.

Talking about wanting to committing suicide. The more he says he wants to die the more he means it. If you feel his talk of wanting to die is getting more frequent, get help now. Do not leave him alone.
Researching suicide. There are online resources that suggest ways to kill yourself. Check to see if your loved one has been doing this type of research.
Talking about feeling hopeless or having no reason to live
Talking about feeling trapped or in unbearable pain
Talking about being a burden to others
Increasing the use of alcohol or drugs
Acting anxious or agitated; behaving recklessly
Sleeping too little or too much
Withdrawing or feeling isolated
Showing rage or talking about seeking revenge
Displaying extreme mood swings

How to help a suicidal loved one

March 12, 2015 By Kay Walker

The most important thing you need to know about supporting a suicidal friend or family member is that it’s not your job to fix them. It’s not your job to give advice. It’s not your job to save them.

It is, however, your job to help them get professional help. And to be a safe place where they can come and feel listened to and supported in a loving way.

It’s a fine balance and this article will help.

How to help a suicidal loved one

It’s on you to make sure they get professional help. You need to silently appoint yourself their health advocate. “Silently”, because you don’t want them to feel like their not in charge of her life anymore. If you make them do things forcefully, they will resent you. They may even do the opposite out of spite. Right now, they need someone who is healthy to help them get professional help. It could be hard for them to do this themselves. They are dealing with an illness that affects their mood, body and energy levels.
Educate yourself about suicide and depression. Learning will help you understand what your loved one is going through. If you’ve never felt suicidal or had major depression yourself, it’s impossible for you to fully relate. When you can’t relate, it’s hard to provide the right kind of support. So, read articles, books and talk to many other people. Call suicide prevention lines or health centers and get advice. When you understand what they’re going through it will translate. It will come out in your communicate. You’ll learn to ask the right questions and to take helpful actions. This will make them feel closer to you and safe in your relationship.
Embrace community. Share with the people in your life what’s going on. When you feel comfortable and where appropriate, it’s okay to confide in others – friends, family members, co-workers – about what you are dealing with, with your loved one. You’ll find that people are generally willing to help. They may even share stories that will help you feel like you’re not alone. They may point you to resources. This is not the time for you to be strong. It’s not a time for you to keep things private. It’s not always easy to talk about suicide or depression, but when you do, you’ll find it affects more people then you ever thought.
Get professional help for yourself. During this time you could be dealing with a lot of stress and confusion about what to do, among the normal things you have to deal with in your own life. Seek professional therapeutic help from a mental health professional. This could be a personal coach, a psychologist, a crisis prevention hotline, or an online forum.
Learn your rights and her rights. When it comes to suicide and mental health there are specific rights given to family members. If your loved one is severely depressed and you can’t get them to get help you can enact specific rights. In Canada, it’s called a Form 2. A policeman will take them away and ensure they get immediate medical attention at a hospital. It’s tough love, and it could save a life.
Don’t wait. Their life is in your hands and it’s a priority. Don’t think that it will get better. Don’t wait. Get in action now. If your loved ons has been depressed and/or suicidal for more than two weeks you need to know that this is a dangerous situation.

How masturbation can help relieve mental and physical pain

March 12, 2015 By Kay Walker

When you feel severely depressed and you’ve exhausted all your options, you can get brief reprieve from the mental and/or physical pain you’re experiencing by masturbating. It will give you major relief on the spot, when you need it.

If you masturbate already, this advice won’t make your uncomfortable. If you don’t, keep reading this article. It will provide you with an understanding of the physiological processes involved in masturbation and how they can temporarily reduce uncomfortable emotional and physical pain

This is science. It’s not wrong or bad to masturbate. It’s completely normal and natural. There is nothing wrong with touching your own body and genitals to bring yourself to orgasm. And it could help you when nothing else can.

Unlike other methods of pain relief – drinking, drugs, overeating, yelling at someone, hiding your life away in a dark room – it’s a healthy way of dealing with biological or neurological pain.

It’s a brilliant way of relieving the mental and physical tension that occurs from anxiety and depression. And it’s something you can do on your own, anytime, anywhere, privately.

How masturbation can help relieve mental and physical pain

How orgasm relieves pain:

The euphoric feeling produced by an orgasm is linked to the nerves sent to the brain’s pleasure center, or reward circuit. The sexual arousal felt in the body floods the brain with a surge of happy brain chemicals.

The areas of the brain impacted by sexual arousal include the amygdala, nucleus accumbens, ventral tegmental area (VTA), cerebellum, and the pituitary gland. These brain regions are all connected to emotional regulation and hormone secretion. Over 30 brain regions are stimulated during an orgasm.

Dopamine is also released during orgasm. It is a feel good chemical. It’s the same chemical that some antidepressants target.

During orgasm a brain region call the lateral orbitofrontal cortex gets turned off. It controls self evaluation, reason and self control. It momentarily stops the brain from thinking the thoughts that are running as a results of anxiety and depression. It shuts down fear and anxiety for a short period of time.

When a woman experiences as orgasm the amgydala brain goes it to a state of relaxation. For men, relaxation to the same area reduces aggression.

Overall, the body experiences deep relaxation and pleasure. The heart rate slows.

Quick tutorial in masturbation

If you don’t masturbate regularly, all you need to do is to touch your body and genitals where it feels good. This is a personal journey.

If you find that you can’t concentrate enough, there are tools you can use that will help you, try:

Vibrators
Sexual images or videos
Help from a partner
Lubricants
Music

Masturbation can help when nothing else can. It’s a healthy way of relieving the pain. Find some private time, alone and give it a try.

What all suicidal people have in common

March 10, 2015 By Kay Walker

There is one common denominator shared by all individuals considering suicide. Every person who wants to take their life is suffering from: Major depression, also known, as clinical depression.

Happy people don’t want to end their lives. They look forward to most days and understand life it is not always perfect. Depressed people, on the other hand, do. They see life as exhausting and painful. And if they don’t see an end to the pain is possible in the near future, suicide can seem like the only logical way out.

What all suicidal people have in common: Major Depression

Definition and self-diagnosis checklist for Major Depression:

North America’s popular medical web site, WebMD.com defines Major Depression this way:

Most people feel sad or low at some point in their lives. But major depression is marked by a depressed mood most of the day, particularly in the morning, and a loss of interest in normal activities and relationships – symptoms that are present every day for at least 2 weeks.

Diagnosing depression: What criteria do health professionals use to diagnosis severe depression?

Health professionals use the DSM-V, a medical text that lists the diagnostic criteria for all neurological disorders (illnesses that affect brain chemistry), to formally diagnosis depression. Below, is the outline they use.

DSM-V Criteria for Major Depressive Disorder:

Five (or more) of the following symptoms have been present during the same 2- week period and represent a change from previous functioning; at least one of the symptoms is either (1) depressed mood or (2) loss of interest or pleasure.

[Note: Do not include symptoms that are clearly due to a general medical condition, or mood-incongruent delusions or hallucinations.]

Depressed mood most of the day, nearly every day, as indicated by either subjective report (e.g., feels sad or empty) or observation made by others (e.g., appears tearful). Note: In children and adolescents, can be irritable mood.
Markedly diminished interest or pleasure in all, or almost all, activities most of the day, nearly every day (as indicated by either subjective account or observation made by others).
Significant weight loss when not dieting or weight gain (e.g., a change of more than 5 percent of body weight in a month), or decrease or increase in appetite nearly every day. Note: In children, consider failure to make expected weight gains.
Insomnia or hypersomnia nearly every day.
Psychomotor agitation or retardation nearly every day (observable by others, not merely subjective feelings of restlessness or being slowed down).
Fatigue or loss of energy nearly every day.
Feelings of worthlessness or excessive or inappropriate guilt (which may be delusional) nearly every day (not merely self-reproach or guilt about being sick).
Diminished ability to think or concentrate, or indecisiveness, nearly every day (either by subjective account or as observed by others).
Recurrent thoughts of death (not just fear of dying), recurrent suicidal ideation without a specific plan, or a suicide attempt or a specific plan for committing suicide.

a) The symptoms cause clinically significant distress or impairment in social, occupational or other important areas of functioning.

b) The symptoms are not due to the direct physiological effects of a substance (e.g., a drug of abuse, a medication) or a general medical condition (e.g., hypothyroidism).

If you fit into the above criteria, you could have Major Depression. If you believe that is your diagnosis, you should continue to read the literature on this page. It will help you now while you wait to get professional help.